


The Days of Suffering

by alyssanolastnameneeded



Category: None - Fandom
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-19
Updated: 2019-01-20
Packaged: 2019-10-12 13:03:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17468099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alyssanolastnameneeded/pseuds/alyssanolastnameneeded
Summary: Cancer. Stage four. Prognosis is not good. Are the only words Jayden hears about his son before his whole world flipped the person who was supposed to stay with him till death left. He's in uncharted territory and has to watch his son go through. How does he make it through this hell?





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is not fanfic this is an original work. This not based off of a true story.

There are more than a million things I could use to describe my son. Cancer wasn’t ever one. I also never associated with the words chemo or stage four Osteosarcoma, of course, I wasn’t stupid. But this was my kid, my boy. One of my twins. My eldest the boy I bottle fed when he was three days old the kid, I coached baseball too for almost ten years. Not him not, his brother and not his sister this was selfish of me I know but not my Luke.  
You always think not my kid, my kids healthy and happy. That is until they aren't that is until it's them poison injected into them Until it's them on their death bed. The day before I always thought he's fine it's just a limp, but now I remember every detail, every moment every doctor's appointment everything from the beginning to now. We had countless days before that we took for granted. Every moment with your child after being diagnosed with cancer is precious because you don’t if it’ll be their last.  
I’m not writing for me myself, I’m here writing for my child Lucas Alexander Michaels.


	2. The begining

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This my own work

This started like any other Drs appointment. I had Luke and Logan, the twins for their yearly checkup. They’d just start 9th grade. They had turned fourteen a while ago. Luke didn’t act out of the ordinary. I mean sure he was pale but he was always pale in the sunlight he had light blue eyes with black hair that was wavy and feel right below his ears it was always in his face but what I should’ve noticed is Logan wasn’t pale.

Logan was first he had his vitals taken his temperature was low but it always was everything else was normal for him they gave him his yearly shots and a flu shot and then he was done.

Then it was Luke's turn his temperature was running high it was 99.9 degrees which didn’t worry us I mean he goes to high school he’s in the marching band. They did the rest it looked good.   
We hadn't changed doctors since the boys were born. Her name was Dr. Smith she was nice and gentle she had light brown hair and hazel brown eyes. She did the normal routine she felt his arms for anything and then his knees down and went to check his reflexes she went to his right knee and tapped it he jumped up and inhaled. She bit her lip, looking at it “is something wrong” I asked concerned   
“When was the last time he hurt his knee?” she had asked. Luke hurting his knee was an almost every month thing   
“It’s been about three months why? Is he okay?” I asked   
“Well there is something swing your legs up there,” she told him she pointed to the swelling pressing lightly   
“Good god,” he said sitting up   
“This is going to hurt,” She said and started pushing around until she felt at the time a foreign object. 

“I am sending him for an x-ray get him in ASAP I don't what it is so just to be safe okay? “  
I nod as we got ready to leave. He had started limping “you okay?” I asked”yeah dad just hurts I’ll live he said   
We were soon driving to a local orthopedic when we got in we talked to them explaining what was happening they took us back to x-ray as soon as they could Luke was gone for 15 minutes when he came back with a grim face   
“What is it, ”I asked   
“Doctors did not look to happy” he admitted I sigh after a while the doctor came in   
“Okay here is X rays from this time and last time,” he said   
“they look the same,” I said   
“Except for this,” he said zooming in. It looked cloudy the best way to describe the first x-ray  
“What is that?”  
“We don't know it could just be our machines but it could also be something more so we need to get an MRI just in case”  
I closed my eyes this felt   
Like a wild goose chase but we agreed they gave Luke crutches to stay off it I called his mom explaining what was going on she was not happy I went to orthopedic without her   
“She said immediately”   
“You could've actually called”  
“Well I have all three kids so it's not like it was a piece of cake Cameron has been fussy so unless you want to take over stop criticizing me I have to call to schedule for an MRI he's is not allowed to have absolutely no weight on his leg I'll see you at home” I said hanging up


	3. The end of the begining

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is my own work

I wish I could say things got better but they didn't his knee swelled he was in so much pain some days he didn't even go to school it took a month to get him in his mom was at home with Cameron. I should elaborate on Cameron she is six months old and has dark green eyes from her mom and blonde hair from me and there is never a minute she's not smiling.  
Anyways he slept on the way in it was early around 6 I shook him awake “we’re here” I said he nods getting out as we got to an elevator and took it up  
After we got in they took him back and I was stuck in a small room which I paced back in fourth in for around an hour and a half before I called his mom he had crutched back in about half an hour later which is when I hung up “hey bud how'd it go?” I asked “god” he mumbled  
“here are your discharge papers we will call you later with results” we took the papers and left  
We continued as normal we went to breakfast and then I dropped him off at school.  
I drove back home meeting his mother “hey how'd it go” she asked  
“Good” I answered taking Cameron  
“Your lying”  
“I'm not”  
“I've married to you for a decade I know when you lie you shut people out”  
“It went fine, “ I said again  
“Stop it “  
“I am not lying”  
“Then what's wrong”  
“I'm worried about him”  
“So am I “  
“No I mean even when he's been just hurt in the past he's walked and let us figure it out this - whatever this is its bad he's in constant pain and it's hard on me I don't know how to fix it “  
“I'm sure it's nothing” that's the irony of it that's when the call came. I answered immediately.  
“Hello”  
“Is this Mr.Michaels?”  
“Yes”  
“We reviewed your sons MRI”  
“Okay”  
“You need to go to the nearest hospital with him”  
“Why?”  
“Sir I'm not supposed to tell you these things over the phone, it's very stressful”  
“Tell what on God's Earth is wrong with my son” I snapped  
“Sir your son has Osteosarcoma. Which is a kind of cancer” I wish I could say my whole world stopped, that it stood still but it didn't. The word cancer bounced around my head which was going a million times faster at those words I felt sick in my stomach.  
“Sir are you there?”  
“Uh yeah yeah I'm here I'll have him down there,” I said and hung up.  
I kicked the wall and leaned against it “what is it”  
I rub my face “he's got cancer its fucking cancer” I said she looked at me long and hard and stood “where are you going?” I ask following  
“Away”  
“Your leaving?’  
“Yes”  
“Really our child the kid we've raised has cancer and of all the things you could do your leaving!”  
“You don't understand!”  
“Then enlighten me”  
“I can't lose him! I can't watch him die!”  
“He's not going to die he won't he'll beat it he's going to go to prom and graduate and your going to miss it all because you were scared well news flash I'm terrified I have to watch it I have to watch him go through hell with no release I'm more than terrified but I'm not leaving!”  
She shook her head grabbing a bag “no you don't get to do this you can't he needs you! I'm not gonna stand here and let you leave when I know this will break him you can't go’!”  
“ watch me,” she said walking out the door.


	4. Telling them and the new office

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this my own work

I got Cameron in her car seat and got to the school. I walked in “Hey Mr.Michaels Luke” the secretary asked. “Uh and Logan, ”I said.It was only noon and this was already the worst day of my life. The boys walked in confused. “What’s going on where’s a mom,” Logan asked immediately I looked away, how could I explain this?  
“I’ll explain in the car,” I said as we walked out. They climbed in Luke upfront Logan in the back. “Dad, what is going on?” Luke asked “Your test results came back,” I said quietly”Oh.. And?” He asked “They want me to take you to the hospital,” I said “Why?” he asked  
“Your s-” This wasn’t just any sickness I couldn’t just say sick it didn’t describe it.   
“What is it, Dad?” Logan asked  
“Luke uh I don’t really know how to say this um there was a mass on the MRI and uh they said its..”I looked up  
“They said its cancer,” I said quietly Logan shook his head   
“No no no no,” Logan said Luke just stared blankly a thought must’ve popped into his head  
“Where’s a mom?”  
“She left, ”I said driving   
“To?”  
“I don’t know okay? She packed a bag and left” I said closing the subject I turned the radio on as it plays classic rock   
Soon enough we pulled in and I parked and got the diaper back and Cameron who was asleep and walked in and we walked to a place id always prayed not to go in. This wasn't supposed to be him. The door read Cancer and Blood Institute. I pushed the door and walked in and looked around it was depressing there were so many little kids four or five years old who looked to be losing the battle “dad I can't I have to go to the bathroom”Logan says rushing off I got up there “uh we were called uh for Lucas Michaels” I said “bone cancer? Diagnosis this afternoon?”  
“That's him”  
“Go have a seat we'll call you back let me know if we can do anything to help at all” I nod and walk to go sit as Logan walks back out sitting down   
“Do you want to call a friend to have them pick you up?” I asked him   
“No, I'm fine”   
“Lucas Michaels!” A nurse called   
We got over “okay so walk this way,” the nurse said taking us in a room   
“I need to ask a few routine questions I'll do dad first”  
“Are you married?”  
“Uh wife walked out”  
“How long ago”  
“About an hour and a half”  
“Oh I see”  
“Do you smoke do drugs or drink”  
“No to all”  
“Okay onto Lucas”  
“Luke” Luke said   
“excuse me?”  
“I like Luke”  
“Okay do you feel safe at home”  
“Yes”  
“Do you want to hurt yourself or anyone around you?”  
“No”  
“Do you drink do drug or smoke”  
“No no, and no”  
“How are you in school?”  
“Good”  
“Did your parents ever fight”  
“I mean not excessively”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Well they had a fight here and there but never enough for mom to leave”  
“Okay, Mr.Michaels can I talk to you in the hall?”  
I follow her out “your ex”  
“What about her”  
“Did she leave because of cancer ?”  
I sighed rubbing my face “yeah she did”   
“Are you prepared for this I'm telling you this from personal experience this is hell without having to rise to other kids”  
“Your kid?”  
“My brother actually my parents weren't around much”  
“I get it yeah I have to be I can't run I have to stay so I don't get a choice they need me”   
“The doctor will be in soon” I nod walking in picking Cameron up as we wait anxiously. I could sense the nervousness in the air Logan was paler than Luke.   
Thankfully the Dr. walked in only 15 minutes later. “Hey I am Dr.Jordans and I will be your doctor through this long tiring journey and I will see to my best ability to have you beat this” he stated   
“You must be Mr.Michaels and Luke,” he said shaking our hands “And who are you two?” he asked   
“This is Logan and Cameron”  
“Twins?”  
“Yeah”  
“Wonderful”  
“So you will be admitted tonight tomorrow you need have three operations their everyday operations in this unit, first is your central line placement then we need to take a sample of bone marrow to see if your cancer has spread beyond your leg and a tumor biopsy to see what stage you're in”  
“Tomorrow?”  
“I know it's sudden but the sooner the better”  
“Okay you know what you're doing “  
“I’m not going to give you it’ll be okay speech it’s going to be hell. I won’t lie I’ve seen patients die but I’ve also seen patients live into their 90s so I’ll try my best to make you as good as you can be we have the best surgeons in the world you couldn’t be in better hands that I can promise”  
“All right”  
“I’ll have someone transfer you to the inpatient ward tomorrow after all the results we will discuss treatment try to sleep,” He said leaving. I immediately got up “Stay here I’ll be back” I said walking out dialing my dad's number my dad left my mom when I was 12 it was rough I hated him he missed every birthday every Christmas for the rest of my life he wasn’t there but he lived close by I knew he had kids recently they were 14 or so. But I let it ring “Hello?” He asked confused we never talked   
“Thank god you answered”  
“What’s up Jay”  
“It’s Luke I need you to come and pick Logan and Cameron up from the hospital”  
“What’s going on” He could tell I was on the verge of tears  
“Luke has cancer dad”  
“Shit, where’s Lauri?”  
“She left us”  
“I’m on my way do you need anything?”  
“no”  
I said and hung up walking back in explaining what was happening Logan wasn’t happy but I couldn’t have him here. Not now.


	5. Chapter 5

My dad picked the kids up at around six dropped off some dinner as well. It’s around 12 and Luke and I was both still up. I quickly excused myself and dialed Lauri’s number I knew it was really useless for me to call her but I had to.  
I of course was sent to voicemail “Hey I know you made your choice but Luke has three operations tomorrow one for tumor biopsy one for bone marrow and the last one for a central line placement um I would really appreciate it for you to pop in to say goodbye to him um Cameron and Logan are at dads till 3 tomorrow if you could stop by around 4 again that’d be wonderful I’ll be waiting with the divorce papers waiting for you to sign so if your coming let me know”I said hanging up and walking in Luke was asleep. I pulled out the pull out and tried to get some sleep.   
*

We got up around 8 for his surgery he wasn’t taken in till 10. I, of course, didn’t do much besides pace and talked to Logan on the phone for a bit around noon my phone buzzed and I looked it was from Laurie it read: I’m coming to say goodbye and sign the papers that were it I just ignored it. It wasn’t till 2:30 that Luke was brought into recovery he woke up at 3 on the dot and we were back up in the room. He was in pain I could tell he kept his eyes closed his phone was discarded alls he was doing was squeezing a stress ball.   
Dad and the kids got there at 3:15. “Thanks, dad,”   
I said walking over  
“It’s not a problem.. How is he?”  
“In pain mostly but could be worse”  
“Anything from Lauri?”  
“Yeah she’s stopping by to sign the official divorce papers and to say her goodbyes”   
“Oh”   
“Yeah” If on cue a knock on the door and then she walked in. Luke’s eyes shot open “Mom? What’re you doing here?” He said trying to sit up clenching his teeth  
“Stay laying sweetie I couldn’t part without saying goodbye”  
“Why are you leaving?” He asked   
“We’ve decided to go on separate paths we wanted different thing” I put in. He nods laying back down. Logan just stayed back in the corner obviously furious. Cameron reached for her I handed her over as I signed. She sat down with her signing it”I’ll turn it over text a date” I said. She stayed a good hour and a half she hugged Cameron sitting her down going to like hugging him gently “love you”   
“Love you too”  
She then went to Logan who hadn’t said a word “Love you lo”  
“No you don’t “he snapped   
“What’re you talking about?”  
“Your leaving when we need you the most! Luke needs you! Dad’s barely keeping it together and I can’t just live with grandpa! If you loved us you’d stay” he yelled   
“Logan I can’t”  
“Why not”  
“Because it’s time you learned to do things on your own”  
“What about Dad huh? Did you ever love him?”  
“No,” She said I shot up   
“Get out! Now” I snapped pushing her out following her  
“YOU JUST RUINED OUR CHILDREN’S WHOLE CHILDHOOD!”  
“They needed to here” “THEY DID NOT”  
“Jayden..”  
“Get out of my sight before I do something I’ll regret” she looked at me “GO!” she walked off I walked outside where I punched the building as a few tears slide. How could she?  
“Sir are you okay?”It was a nurse from yesterday the one that checked us in “Uh yeah fine” I said wiping my eyes turning “I take your ex stopped by”  
“Oh yeah she did”  
“What’d she say if you don’t mind me asking”  
“Just that she never loved me and that the kids needed to learn to be on their own”  
“Want a coffee?”   
“I can’t I have to go wash my face and return to Luke”   
“Understandable I’ll probably run into you again”   
“From the looks of it”   
“I’ll see you later”I nod walking in I never did describe how she looked she had brown curly hair green eyes and black hipster glasses. I walked back up washing my face and walking in   
“Where’s ${719139a9-06ce-ad95-2fa5-262689358c17}?” Luke asked   
“Not here”  
“Okay” Logan was crying   
“I’m sorry dad I shouldn’t have fought with her” I sat next to him wrapping an arm around him “It’s not your fault Buddy”  
“Then whose is it?”  
“No ones this disease brings out the worst in everyone just calm down”  
“Did she mean it?” he asked looking up at me  
“I don’t know buddy I don’t know”  
Around six Dr.Jordan walked in with the results he didn’t look too happy. “What’s up?”I asked   
“Well looked like we’ve got stage four,” he said I breathed in “Okay what about the bone marrow”  
“It’s spread up”  
“What can we do?”  
“For now chemotherapy and radiation therapy “  
“After that”  
“We’ll have to see,” He said looking over to dad   
“I don’t believe I met you last night”  
“No I’m Jayden's dad Luke’s grandpa Jacob, ”He said shaking his hand. “Chemo will start next week we have to give the incision time to heal but we’ll have you stay here”  
“Okay”  
“What about school?”Luke piped up  
“It’s not safe I can allow you the first bit of treatment until your count swoop down to low after that you’ll need to switch to homeschooling”

 

“Okay” he walked out “we should head out,” dad said   
“All right thanks again,” I said hugging him   
“Anything I can do to help”  
“Okay be good lo,” I said as Logan nods   
“Have you told your mom”  
“No”  
“Call her” my mom lived in California with my stepdad while we lived in Ohio   
“Okay” they then left it was eight by then “are you going to call her?” Luke asked   
“I should, “ I said standing “I'll be back,” I said and walked out dialing  
Her number   
“Hey sweetie,” she said answering  
“Uh hey mom”  
“How are you? It's been days”  
“About that, I was avoiding calling because I didn't want to tell you over the phone but Luke he um he's not well”  
“What's wrong”  
“He's got stage four bone cancer”  
“Good god no not again“  
“Yeah he does he uh starts chemo tomorrow “   
“Do you want me to fly out with David?”   
“No, no dads helping out watching the kids till we get out of the hospital”  
“Are you sure?”  
“Yeah between Dad Emma (my stepmom) and there kids we've got it covered I'll call you with updates”  
“Okay bye”  
“Bye mom,” I said hanging up David and I did not get along he always thought it was my fault my mom had to work so much but I couldn't help it. I tried hard to be a good kid for her. I got good grades and kept quiet and didn’t get in trouble.  
\---------------------------------------  
The next week went by agonizingly slow we were up by seven. We waited about an hour when a nurse came in with fluids and the drugs. “Can you sign here?” she asked handing me a clipboard ”What is this?” I asked   
“If he anything happens you won’t sue us” I signed off and handed it back she went over and put an iv in he flinched lightly and then relaxed when she pulled the needle out and then attached the fluids and the long hours went by slowly he slept through most of it he was pale when he woke up right before the chemo was done. “Dad I don’t feel. Good” He said between breaths “What is it?” I asked that’s when he started gagging I pressed the nurse button “yes?”   
“Uh his chemos almost gone but he's about to be” I started and that's when he threw up, unfortunately, it was all over me as I was sitting on the bed and leaning over him “He was sick and now it’s a mix between me and the bed “  
“We’ll send in the doctor” I stood grabbing my bag “Sorry dad,” he said  
“It’s fine Luke,” I said throwing on a fresh pair on black jeans and sweatshirt walking out as Dr.Jordans knocked “so we got sick on your dad and bed right?”   
“Yes,” I said   
“Well luckily this is just a side effect from the chemo so sense that’s done we’ll push in some nausea medicine and get you fresh sheets” He said helping Luke stand with the pole “24 hour surveillance will be needed to watch and see what other side affects you are effect by and then you can go home for a few days” He said as he got a nurse to get him some more medicine for his stomach “okay okay so there's a few things we need to go over at home" he said I nod “you will have to flush his central line daily you'll have a class on that and well have to change the adhesive on his central line placement sense we had chemo there will be a lot more bone pain so we'll send a pain medication over to your pharmacy and if he even so much has had a fever you need to make sure it breaks his immune system is compromised with the first week if not longer after that we will go in and do radiation then you'll stay at most a week if all goes well than a few days and then another 3 or 4 days off at home for your immune system to build and then you can go back to school a few weeks until we do this again” he said I nod “thanks" i said looking over “alright like I'm going to go call grandpa and grandma" I said he nods I walk out dialing my moms number “hey sweetie how is he?” she asked as she answered “uh uh well I guess good or has good as you can be we just finished chemo treatment one and we will go home tomorrow for about a week and then come back for radiation and then he gets a break" I explained “okay “ I heard a bang “what was that?” I asked “David's kids are over, “ she said those kids are insane “I gotta let you go,” I said hanging up and doing the same thing with dad….


	6. Chapter 6

  
  
**The next week went by and we were back for radiation he was taken back. I sat in his room and waited about 15 minutes later he came back crutching I smile “done already?”** **  
** **“Yeah," he said this was a three day stay two days would be radiation the last one would be to watch for side effects.** **  
** **The days passed quicker than we thought soon we were walking out. I stopped to talk to the doctor for a minute while he was getting a drink out of the vending machine “hey Luke has a marching competition in about a week can he go” I asked** **  
** **“I don’t know if his counts would be back up”** **  
** **“Oh”** **  
** **“How about this you come back next Friday and we’ll check his counts,” He said I smiled** **  
** **“I’ll see you Friday,” I said as Luke waited I walk over as we left “guess what”** **  
** **“What’s up?”** **  
** **“Well I talked to your doctor and if we come back Friday and if your counts are all right then you can go to the competition “** **  
** **“wait seriously?”** **  
** **“yeah"** **  
** **“what about the crutches"** **  
** **“you can march but that's it" he broke into a smile “ let's go I have to practice “ I smiled this was the Luke I knew and loved.** **  
** **\--------------------** **  
** **The appointment went smoothly exactly as we thought so the next day we were packing his bag with his meds “are you sure you have everything?”** **  
** **“yes dad I'll be fine okay we are going to be late he said crutching out I grabbed his trombone and bag walking out to his ride “thanks again," I said to his friend Erica's mom “its no problem”** **  
** **“ anything you might need is here his pain meds he has to take his anti-nausea at 10 30 and the rest he can take after the show and he knows my number “** **  
** **“all right thanks" I nod** **  
** **I turn to Luke hugging him “be good call me if you need anything" I said** **  
** **“I will love you dad" this was the first time he'd said this to me.** **  
** **“love you too, “ I said had he got in I watched as they drove I walked in and sat in the armchair. Funny thing is nothing happened at the competition, in fact, they came in third it wasn't until late that night that it started. Someone shaking me awake. I groaned my vision being blurry from not having my contacts in I pushed a pair of glasses on. “Logan? What’s wrong?”I said sitting up** **  
** **“Luke. I-I didn’t know what to do he threw up all over himself again and he says his chest is on fire or what I could make out”I ran into the room knocking the thing off my dresser as I ran into their room getting over to Luke feeling his forehead it was burning hot. “Luke,” I said trying to wake him back up sitting him up as he groaned. “Luke I have to take your shirt off,” I said he mumbled something incoherent I pulled his bagging t-shirt over his head. I looked at his port it was red and I touched it lightly”dad…. Stop it” He said opening his eyes they were dilated with my heart racing unsure what to do “Logan!” I called he ran in “Is he okay?” He asked** **  
** **“Go wake grandma up”** **  
** **“Dad..”** **  
** **“Now,” I said as he ran out as I pulled a shirt over him again I ran in my room grabbing a random shirt As mom ran in behind me as she saw a giant scar on my back “Jayden where did you get those?”** **  
** **“Mom not right now I have to get Luke to the hospital I.. Can you watch Logan and Cameron ?” I asked grabbing the go bag with his dressing for his port change his clothes and my clothes as I wearing gym shorts and what seems to be my numeric pie shirt. “Of course are you sure you don’t need a ride?”** **  
** **“I’ll be fine,” I said going into Luke’s room and slipping on my slip on gym shoes and picking him up mom seemed surprised yet again. I walked him out to the car and getting him buckled as his stomach lurches again “Logan Bucket!” I called he ran out with one I should explain Luke is not in fact covered in puke still I put him in clean clothes. I got in and started driving what seemingly would’ve seemed like a maniac from an outside view every red light I would make sure he was still breathing. I finally got there picking him up and carrying him over to the wheelchairs and pushing him in and seeing the line I decided I couldn’t wait so I cut to the front I heard people cussing me out and yelling at me”Was there reason that was necessary sir?” The receptionist asked** **  
** **“My son has cancer stage four bone cancer I think his port is infected he’s got a high fever he’s been unresponsive for about half an hour and when he wasn’t he said it felt like his chest was on fire,” I said hurriedly.** **  
** **“Okay sir I’ll call the oncologist immediately,” She said as my phone rang it was Logan. “Hey what’s up I only have a second,” I said** **  
** **“Is he okay?” Logan said panicked** **  
** **“Logan calm down I need you to calm down they are calling oncology right now to take a look he’s unresponsive they aren’t sure why it’s probably the fever or the port, “ I said** **  
** **“All right all right I’ll let you go call me when they know something”** **  
** **“I will but logan you need to go to bed it’s four in the morning he’ll be fine I promise,” I said** **  
** **“Fine dad” he said hanging up right as he did that a lady came back “Luckas Michaels!” she called I pushed through saying excuse me as I went and then we got back behind the door “so we’re going to basically just go to the oncology wing,” she said I nod following her it was like a ten minute walk with elevators before we got back.** **  
** **  
** **A nurse up front came back to get him. She took his chair from me as I followed pulling him into the same room we had received his original treatment in. I helped get him on the bed a nurse came in with needles ready to draw blood, and another nurse to check vital she collected his blood from his arm vein seeing as the port could be infected he was still out of it she ran the thomonter over his forehead as I heard it beat quickly. “What is it ?” I asked** **  
** **“103.78” I ran a hand through my hair as the nurse that took the blood put an IV in and immediately hooked it up two bags of some kind of fluids”This is just some Normal Saline to keep him hydrated and Tylenol to try and break the fever “She told me I nod “the oncologist on call will be in soon” She said walking out. I took his hand lightly hoping he might just start to stir no such luck. It had been at least half an hour before I heard a knock. A man that looks to be in his early thirties came in. He had his black hair up in a man bun and his brown eyes looked guarded and he was probably 6’5 he was wearing grey scrubs. “All right, I’m dr. Jackson,” he said I nod “What’s his problem,” he asked** **  
** **“I think it’s his port I-I don’t really know much his brother came in shaking me awake  I got up he said that Luke got sick on himself and had said his chest was on fire I looked at it was um. Red  and hot” I said he nods moving the IV pole “Is it okay if I remove his shirt?” He asked** **  
** **“Oh uh of course,” I said he slowly moved his shirt off looking at the port “well you're right it’s definitely infected”** **  
** **“Okay?”** **  
** **“We can do either immediate removal or we can try and treat the infection without removal as a doctor I would recommend the latter”** **  
** **“All right”** **  
** **“But as a father I recommend the first” I felt like I was drowning in these decisions my sons' life could depend on this infection isn’t good in any case let alone a kid with cancer. “Could you. Could you give me a minute”I asked** **  
** **“Yeah I’ll be back,” he said grabbing his chart and walking out. As soon as he left my phone rang it was Logan again I hated doing this Logan shouldn’t have to worry about losing his brother let alone his twin. “Hey Lo, ”I said it was nearing six.** **  
** **“Dad, what’s going on?”** **  
** **“Uh well he’s still b unconscious they have fluid and Tylenol it’s definitely infected”** **  
** **“Is he.. Will he be ok?”** **  
** **“Uh yeah I think so I think he’ll pull out of it remember she's a fighter I need you to get ready for school and give the phone to grandma”** **  
** **“Dad I can’t go to school as he could… dad what if something goes wrong what if they do something wrong w-w-what if he died” He said I could tell he was crying now** **  
** **“Logan listen to me he won’t die I’m not going to let him we are the best place we can be at this point they’re trying to get him treated for the infection I promise I will come to get you after school he’s not going to die”** **  
** **“Promise?”** **  
** **“I promise”** **  
** **“Okay,” he said as he handed his phone over “Jayde how is he” mom immediately asked I was just barring my feelings at this point** **  
** **“He's uh passed out but, ”I said closing my eyes “The port its uh infected they can treat it with or without the port”** **  
** **“Okay?”** **  
** **“I-I don’t know what to do this-this could be bad but I don’t want to cause him for pain than he’s already in but the other one isn’t as I guess productive”** **  
** **“Jayden I can’t tell you which one is the best I don’t know I never dealt with cancer treatments your aunt locked herself away she didn’t reach out I don’t know what’s best for Luke you do you’ll make the right decision I know you will”** **  
** **“Thanks, mom,” I said as the doctor walked in** **  
** **“What’s the plan”** **  
** **“I… Take it out that’s going to be the best way for him”** **  
** **“All right,” He said grabbing a pair of gloved taping the call button on his bed “What can we get for you”** **  
** **“This is Dr.Jackson I need the material for a central line removal”** **  
** **“I’ll send a nurse in”** **  
** **“Okay thanks” we waited about 5 minutes** **  
** **“Do you want to step out or you okay”** **  
** **“I’m good,” I said as they pulled his shirt off carefully removing the dressing sitting it on the table grabbing a pair of oversized tweezers and grabbing on to the port and pulling. I watched as this long tube came out of my son's chest I closed my eyes when I opened them they had bandaged him and now we're checking his fever “his fever is coming down he should be up soon” the nurse went out.** **  
** **  
** **The nurse I keep running into knocked “come in”** **  
** **“Hey”** **  
** **“Oh hi, ”I said I wasn’t expecting anyone to pop in** **  
** **“I uh herd you guys were in and I’m working tonight and uh” She chuckled lightly”I was worried about Luke” she admitted. I smiled lightly** **  
** **“His port got infected... Uh, they took out said he’ll be up soon” I said. She nods** **  
** **“It’s unlikely that they ever do that”** **  
** **“Oh, it is?” I asked** **  
** **“Yeah I mean honestly it’s up to the guardian to make the decision,” she said I nod** **  
** **“So would it be okay if I left my number I mean not for medical uses but I understand what you're going through and it’s like going through hades through it on your own?”** **  
** **“Definitely” I answered. She smiled writing it down and leaving. Not too long after Luke woke up coughing it was around 9 by then. I immediately went out and seeing a doctor “excuse me” I said** **  
** **“What can I do for you”** **  
** **“Uh my son just woke they said to notify someone “** **  
** **“I’ll send someone in, “ He said walking over to his doctor and talking as I went back in.**


	7. Chapter 6:The infection

The next week went by and we were back for radiation he was taken back. I sat in his room and waited about 15 minutes later he came back crutching I smile “done already?”   
“Yeah," he said this was a three day stay two days would be radiation the last one would be to watch for side effects.   
The days passed quicker than we thought soon we were walking out. I stopped to talk to the doctor for a minute while he was getting a drink out of the vending machine “hey Luke has a marching competition in about a week can he go” I asked  
“I don’t know if his counts would be back up”  
“Oh”  
“How about this you come back next Friday and we’ll check his counts,” He said I smiled   
“I’ll see you Friday,” I said as Luke waited I walk over as we left “guess what”  
“What’s up?”  
“Well I talked to your doctor and if we come back Friday and if your counts are all right then you can go to the competition “  
“wait seriously?”  
“yeah"  
“what about the crutches"  
“you can march but that's it" he broke into a smile “ let's go I have to practice “ I smiled this was the Luke I knew and loved. --------------------  
The appointment went smoothly exactly as we thought so the next day we were packing his bag with his meds “are you sure you have everything?”  
“yes dad I'll be fine okay we are going to be late he said crutching out I grabbed his trombone and bag walking out to his ride “thanks again," I said to his friend Erica's mom “its no problem”  
“ anything you might need is here his pain meds he has to take his anti-nausea at 10 30 and the rest he can take after the show and he knows my number “  
“all right thanks" I nod   
I turn to Luke hugging him “be good call me if you need anything" I said --------------------  
The appointment went smoothly exactly as we thought so the next day we were packing his bag with his meds “are you sure you have everything?”  
“yes dad I'll be fine okay we are going to be late he said crutching out I grabbed his trombone and bag walking out to his ride “thanks again," I said to his friend Erica's mom “its no problem”  
“ anything you might need is here his pain meds he has to take his anti-nausea at 10 30 and the rest he can take after the show and he knows my number “  
“all right thanks" I nod   
I turn to Luke hugging him “be good call me if you need anything" I said   
“I will love you dad" this was the first time he'd said this to me.  
“love you too, “ I said had he got in I watched as they drove I walked in and sat in the armchair. Funny thing is nothing happened at the competition, in fact, they came in third it wasn't until late that night that it started. Someone shaking me awake. I groaned my vision being blurry from not having my contacts in I pushed a pair of glasses on. “Logan? What’s wrong?”I said sitting up  
“Luke. I-I didn’t know what to do he threw up all over himself again and he says his 

chest is on fire or what I could make out”I ran into the room knocking the thing off my dresser as I ran into their room getting over to Luke feeling his forehead it was burning hot. “Luke,” I said trying to wake him back up sitting him up as he groaned. “Luke I have to take your shirt off,” I said he mumbled something incoherent I pulled his bagging t-shirt over his head. I looked at his port it was red and I touched it lightly”dad…. Stop it” He said opening his eyes they were dilated with my heart racing unsure what to do “Logan!” I called he ran in “Is he okay?” He asked   
“Go wake grandma up”  
“Dad..”  
“Now,” I said as he ran out as I pulled a shirt over him again I ran in my room grabbing a random shirt As mom ran in behind me as she saw a giant scar on my back “Jayden where did you get those?”   
“Mom not right now I have to get Luke to the hospital I.. Can you watch Logan and Cameron ?” I asked grabbing the go bag with his dressing for his port change his clothes and my clothes as I wearing gym shorts and what seems to be my numeric pie shirt. “Of course are you sure you don’t need a ride?”   
“I’ll be fine,” I said going into Luke’s room and slipping on my slip on gym shoes and picking him up mom seemed surprised yet again. I walked him out to the car and getting him buckled as his stomach lurches again “Logan Bucket!” I called he ran out with one I should explain Luke is not in fact covered in puke still I put him in clean clothes. I got in and started driving what seemingly would’ve seemed like a maniac from an outside view every red light I would make sure he was still breathing. I finally got there picking him up and carrying him over to the wheelchairs and pushing him in and seeing the line I decided I couldn’t wait so I cut to the front I heard people cussing me out and yelling at me”Was there reason that was necessary sir?” The receptionist asked   
“My son has cancer stage four bone cancer I think his port is infected he’s got a high fever he’s been unresponsive for about half an hour and when he wasn’t he said it felt like his chest was on fire,” I said hurriedly.   
“Okay sir I’ll call the oncologist immediately,” She said as my phone rang it was Logan. “Hey what’s up I only have a second,” I said   
“Is he okay?” Logan said panicked   
“Logan calm down I need you to calm down they are calling oncology right now to take a look he’s unresponsive they aren’t sure why it’s probably the fever or the port, “ I said   
“All right all right I’ll let you go call me when they know something”  
“I will but logan you need to go to bed it’s four in the morning he’ll be fine I promise,” I said   
“Fine dad” he said hanging up right as he did that a lady came back “Luckas Michaels!” she called I pushed through saying excuse me as I went and then we got back behind the door “so we’re going to basically just go to the oncology wing,” she said I nod following her it was like a ten minute walk with elevators before we got back.

A nurse up front came back to get him. She took his chair from me as I followed pulling him into the same room we had received his original treatment in. I helped get him on the bed a nurse came in with needles ready to draw blood, and another nurse to check vital she collected his blood from his arm vein seeing as the port could be infected he was still out of it she ran the thomonter over his forehead as I heard it beat quickly. “What is it ?” I asked   
“103.78” I ran a hand through my hair as the nurse that took the blood put an IV in and immediately hooked it up two bags of some kind of fluids”This is just some Normal Saline to keep him hydrated and Tylenol to try and break the fever “She told me I nod “the oncologist on call will be in soon” She said walking out. I took his hand lightly hoping he might just start to stir no such luck. It had been at least half an hour before I heard a knock. A man that looks to be in his early thirties came in. He had his black hair up in a man bun and his brown eyes looked guarded and he was probably 6’5 he was wearing grey scrubs. “All right, I’m dr. Jackson,” he said I nod “What’s his problem,” he asked   
“I think it’s his port I-I don’t really know much his brother came in shaking me awake I got up he said that Luke got sick on himself and had said his chest was on fire I looked at it was um. Red and hot” I said he nods moving the IV pole “Is it okay if I remove his shirt?” He asked  
“Oh uh of course,” I said he slowly moved his shirt off looking at the port “well you're right it’s definitely infected”  
“Okay?”  
“We can do either immediate removal or we can try and treat the infection without removal as a doctor I would recommend the latter”  
“All right”   
“But as a father I recommend the first” I felt like I was drowning in these decisions my sons' life could depend on this infection isn’t good in any case let alone a kid with cancer. “Could you. Could you give me a minute”I asked   
“Yeah I’ll be back,” he said grabbing his chart and walking out. As soon as he left my phone rang it was Logan again I hated doing this Logan shouldn’t have to worry about losing his brother let alone his twin. “Hey Lo, ”I said it was nearing six.   
“Dad, what’s going on?”  
“Uh well he’s still b unconscious they have fluid and Tylenol it’s definitely infected”  
“Is he.. Will he be ok?”  
“Uh yeah I think so I think he’ll pull out of it remember she's a fighter I need you to get ready for school and give the phone to grandma”  
“Dad I can’t go to school as he could… dad what if something goes wrong what if they do something wrong w-w-what if he died” He said I could tell he was crying now   
“Logan listen to me he won’t die I’m not going to let him we are the best place we can be at this point they’re trying to get him treated for the infection I promise I will come to get you after school he’s not going to die”  
“Promise?”  
“I promise”   
“Okay,” he said as he handed his phone over “Jayde how is he” mom immediately asked I was just barring my feelings at this point  
“He's uh passed out but, ”I said closing my eyes “The port its uh infected they can treat it with or without the port”  
“Okay?”  
“I-I don’t know what to do this-this could be bad but I don’t want to cause him for pain than he’s already in but the other one isn’t as I guess productive”  
“Jayden I can’t tell you which one is the best I don’t know I never dealt with cancer treatments your aunt locked herself away she didn’t reach out I don’t know what’s best for Luke you do you’ll make the right decision I know you will”   
“Thanks, mom,” I said as the doctor walked in  
“What’s the plan”  
“I… Take it out that’s going to be the best way for him”   
“All right,” He said grabbing a pair of gloved taping the call button on his bed “What can we get for you”  
“This is Dr.Jackson I need the material for a central line removal”  
“I’ll send a nurse in”   
“Okay thanks” we waited about 5 minutes  
“Do you want to step out or you okay”   
“I’m good,” I said as they pulled his shirt off carefully removing the dressing sitting it on the table grabbing a pair of oversized tweezers and grabbing on to the port and pulling. I watched as this long tube came out of my son's chest I closed my eyes when I opened them they had bandaged him and now we're checking his fever “his fever is coming down he should be up soon” the nurse went out. 

The nurse I keep running into knocked “come in”  
“Hey”  
“Oh hi, ”I said I wasn’t expecting anyone to pop in  
“I uh herd you guys were in and I’m working tonight and uh” She chuckled lightly”I was worried about Luke” she admitted. I smiled lightly  
“His port got infected... Uh, they took out said he’ll be up soon” I said. She nods   
“It’s unlikely that they ever do that”   
“Oh, it is?” I asked   
“Yeah I mean honestly it’s up to the guardian to make the decision,” she said I nod   
“So would it be okay if I left my number I mean not for medical uses but I understand what you're going through and it’s like going through hades through it on your own?”  
“Definitely” I answered. She smiled writing it down and leaving. Not too long after Luke woke up coughing it was around 9 by then. I immediately went out and seeing a doctor “excuse me” I said   
“What can I do for you”  
“Uh my son just woke they said to notify someone “   
“I’ll send someone in, “ He said walking over to his doctor and talking as I went back in.


End file.
